Weekend and Half the Week Gone--Sincere Sympathies to Caregiver Friends

This past weekend was a nightmare, because of nightmares. Saturday night Mom was up 15 times. She’d no sooner get to sleep and she was awake again because of a dream she kept having about someone chasing her and trying to hurt her. Then, the person in the dream was trying to hurt both of us. I felt so bad for her because each time she awoke, she thought she’d been awake and thought the dream was real. She asked me to walk around the house and check all the locks.

It’s amazing how she can be up most of the night, catch a few winks in between, and only show the normal tiredness she shows after a good night’s sleep. Normally when this happens, she gets exhausted around 2:00 and I have to keep her interested in different activities, forcing her to stay awake at least until 4:00 so she can eat dinner and sit up a while for her food to digest some before she goes to bed.

Sunday morning between 8:00 and 9:00 she was up and down 20 times thinking she had to go to the bathroom and feeling like she was going to vomit. Neither of which came to fruition. Each of those 20 times, before trying to get out of bed, she yelled, “Joannnnne, help me!” She’s not running a fever, she was just checked for a UTI, so that’s not the problem. She’s always had an overactive bladder. Her brain is simply malfunctioning and she doesn’t realize she’s been up and down so many times.

Those who care for someone suffering with Alzheimer’s know that a person with AD will get up and wander or roam the house, or think they need to go to the bathroom, when they don’t, or they simply want to go home, not realizing they are in their own home. Some caregivers are up and down with their loved ones 30-50-70 times a night, with no exaggeration, for various reasons. My heart aches for them.

There is no predicting whether or not your loved one will have a good day/night or bad one. You take one day at a time, and one moment at a time. Everything and anything can change from one instance to the next. Just when you think you might have something figured out, it all changes.

Since the weekend, we’ve had the physical therapist and occupational therapist in two more times. Wednesday, the social worker from the hospital came and talked to me about resources available through their office and she discussed getting things in place for hospice when it is needed. She’ll be coming back with more information on Monday.

*** In Memory of Those Who Have Passed ***
I’d like to extend my sincere sympathies to my caregiver friends who have recently lost their loved ones. My thoughts and prayers will be with you during this difficult time. For Lori, Nancy, Terry, Shirl, and so, so many others who have been down this path, please take care of yourselves. Know that I’m thinking of you and keeping you in my heart.

***
For all caregiver friends who continue on this path with their loved ones, know that I also keep your loved ones, you, and your families in my thoughts and prayers. While you care for your loved ones, please take care of yourselves as well.

((HUGS)) to all. Thank you for being you!!!

Nightmares and No Sleep

I didn’t get any sleep at all last night. When Mom finally fell asleep, she woke up every half hour with nightmares. I asked her what her dreams were about and she told me that there were strangers in the house and they were trying to hurt her. I kept telling her that there was no one in the house but us and no one was trying to hurt her. An hour later we went through the same thing. Every thirty minutes to an hour she was screaming for me again. Each time, she said she thought there was someone in the house who was trying to hurt her or me.

Alzheimer's is horrible. Tiny things will stick in our loved one's mind, sometimes good things, sometimes bad things, but we never know what is going through their minds. It's hard to tell what caused her nightmares. It could be a simple schedule change. It could be the smallest memory that aggitates her. It could be my brother's visit. Any number of things could trigger her aggitation. Regardless of what it was, we still deal with the aftermath.

By 7:00 AM she finally fell asleep and she only slept until 10:00. She was exhausted from not sleeping much and I was exhausted from not sleeping at all.

After our morning routine of showering, dressing, and eating breakfast, she complained of being tired. I kept her busy all day to keep her awake and active. I did the laundry and had her fold the clothes and towels. I did the dishes and had her put them away. I had her coloring, working with word finds, hidden picture puzzles; I even had her looking through old magazines pulling out recipes and coupons. We tried anything and everything that would keep her busy and awake.

There was no talk of visitors or dreams. She didn’t remember either.

While I was making dinner, I had her break up lettuce for our salad. She was so exhausted by 3:00, I had to keep talking to her to keep her awake while she ate. She ate very little and wanted to go to bed by 4:00. After dinner we started our bedtime routine. It was earlier than the normal 5:00 bedtime, but there was no sense in trying to keep her up any longer. By 4:15 she was in bed and asleep within minutes.

I can always tell by the level of her snoring how exhausted she is and how much sleep I may get in between her calls for help. This evening I might get 2-3 hours before she wakes and has to use the potty chair. We’ll see. Goodnight, all. I’m grabbing the zzz’s while I can.